Learning to Lead through Trust: A Personal Reflection
One of the most difficult transitions I have embarked upon in my career has been the transition from being a member of a team to becoming the “leader” of that team. While I don’t believe hierarchical leadership is an effective model, it still exists everywhere today. So, I have attempted to live out the culmination of my personal journey through leadership development since I took a “leap of faith” back in 1999.
To begin, I grounded myself in a favorite quote from Simon Sinek,
“Leadership is not about being in charge. Leadership is about taking care of those in your charge.”
Reflection on this quote reminded me that to lead effectively, I needed to have trust built throughout the team. A leader builds trust by giving it first. Instead of waiting for proof, you must show vulnerability, delegate real authority, and invite team members to take risks. This creates a feedback loop where feeling trusted makes people more reliable and willing to return that trust.
If trusting doesn’t come easily to you, learning to trust starts with taking small, intentional steps toward vulnerability. It requires understanding past missteps without letting them control the present, setting clear boundaries, and observing how people show up over time through consistent, reliable actions.
Key Ways Leaders Share Trust
- Delegate authority: Give people the power to make real choices and own their projects without micromanagement.
- Show vulnerability: Admit when you do not know an answer or made a mistake to signal that the team is safe.
- Share context: Give the team background information and strategy details so they understand the bigger picture.
- Accept feedback: Listen to different ideas without being defensive and thank people for being honest.
- Give credit: Name the people who did the work and share praise openly for group success.
By being vulnerable and trusting my staff, I feel that our team is stronger today because my campus community has learned who all the individuals within the Office of Student Records and Registration are, plus they understand that their questions don’t have to begin with the team leader. This approach has created a team of content matter experts who are all actively engaged with the entire campus community and positively representing the Office of Student Records and Registration.
Humbly submitted,
Tory Oelfke
Registrar
College of St. Benedict and St. John’s University
